Lawrence of the Resurrection (1614–1691)
Because you so much wish for me to share the method I use to achieve life in God's presence, I do not wish to keep it from you...
My venerable mother! (1)
Because you so much wish for me to share the method I use to achieve life in God's presence, which our Lord in His mercy has pleased to introduce me to, I do not wish to keep from you that at your urging I reluctantly agree only on the condition that you do not show my letter to anyone. If I knew that you would nevertheless show it to someone, not even a great desire, which I carry in my heart regarding your improvement, would move me to do so (2).
I can tell you the following: after I found various methods and ways in many books on how to practice the spiritual life in order to reach God, it seemed to me that they were more of a hindrance than a help to my soul in achieving what I was striving for and seeking, namely nothing other than some means through which I could wholly belong to God. This moved me to place everything on a single card. And namely – after I completely offered myself to God as reparation for my sins – I renounced everything that is not Him out of love for Him, and began to live as if there were nothing in the world but Him and me. Sometimes I felt before Him like a poor criminal at the feet of his judge, at other times I beheld Him in my heart as my Father, my God. Here I worshiped Him as often as I could, I kept my spirit in His holy presence, and whenever I noticed my distraction, I immediately brought myself back. This exercise cost me much effort, but I did not give up despite all the difficulties I encountered, and I did not let myself be discouraged or disturbed when I was inadvertently distracted. And this I did during the day no less often than during times reserved for prayer. For always, at every hour, at every moment, even in times of work, I strove to keep my spirit apart from everything that could prevent me from thinking of God.
My venerable mother, since I became a religious, this has been my daily exercise. Although I practiced it only very carelessly and imperfectly, I still gained great benefit from it. I know well that I must attribute this benefit to the mercy and goodness of the Lord, for without Him we can do nothing – and I even less than all the others. But when we faithfully remain in His presence, we have Him always before our eyes, He grants us this way of seeing holy freedom, with which we then ask Him for all the necessary graces; besides, it prevents us from offending Him and doing anything that He would not like, at least voluntarily. And finally, these actions, when we (often) repeat them, become second nature to us and God’s presence becomes completely natural to us. Please thank Him with me for His great goodness that He has shown me, and for which – for the many graces He has granted such a poor sinner – I can scarcely help but marvel. Let Him be praised for everything. Amen.
In our Lord
Your...
(1) Lawrence's friend and biographer Joseph de Beaufort published Lawrence's letters only a year after his death. For reasons of discretion, he replaced all names with the letter N. The names of the addressees are thus unknown. This letter was written by Lawrence to some religious sister, and the dating is also missing in this case.
(2) In the sense of: with regard to your spiritual growth.
Excerpted from the book: Brother Lawrence of the Resurrection, Collected Works
Published by: Sr. Ancilla Karl OCD and P. Antonio Sagardoy OCD
In the publishing house: CERF Paris, 1991
Translated by: Norbert Žuška, OCarm.
