XXIII. The loving Mother and the loving Father are beyond comprehension, overshadowed and consumed by divinity. And when they reveal themselves to me in such a way, they so strongly attract and bind my love and attention to themselves, that it is as if their living image no longer remains in me, but everything flows and points to the main object, the divine One and All, and remains in it, yet without a complete loss of sight of them. The remembrance of them and the love for them, or the perception of them, engages with them as they are enclosed beyond understanding in divine essence and united with it, and in this way, I contemplate and regard them in God, and through spiritual love and unity, I am connected with them in God. This is what I can explain about it.
I must also note that I cannot add or subtract anything to it myself. For example, when the loving Mother reveals herself alone, it is beyond my power to have the loving Father present with her or to have him in memory or thought in any way, nor do I have any inclination towards that, as I believe that at that time God dislikes anything else. It happens exactly to the extent of that, and nothing more. But when it passes, I am indifferent to it and laid bare from it, as if it had not happened, and I pay no attention to it at all, only when I partake of that grace. Outside of that time, I am left in spiritual poverty and nakedness, without perceptible action and influence of divine graces, although generally, there remains essential or inner divine light that shines within and leads and guides the soul to all that is good.
The less can any pain, longing, desire, or unrest come into the soul due to the deprivation or withdrawal of that grace, for my peace and satisfaction, it seems, does not rest on enjoying divine charisms or gifts, but on God Himself and on His most perfect pleasure.
For several days now, I have been internally instructed that when I am so abandoned in the poverty and nakedness of spirit, I should behave very calmly and remain in my nothingness, being completely satisfied and content, taking delight and rejoicing that God is in Himself all goodness, that He is self-sufficient, that He is satisfied with Himself and infinitely pleased. To give Him thanks for choosing to take back all outpourings of graces, gifts, and lights to Himself, and to rejoice and delight from the heart, for His graces, gifts, etc., are better and more securely kept in Him than in me, for I often misuse them.
